Current Date: 30/8/2016
So... recently some friends have discovered my old blog. I was considering taking it down for fear of people re-reading my cringe-worthy posts. Scrolling through however, it reminded me of the me I was, and it helped me see the me I am now from a unique perspective. So I've decided to let it stay up.
Interestingly, I found an unpublished blog post from 3 years back. It seemed fitting with the season as well, so why not? Here goes my post from the past unedited.
**Disclaimer**
There might have been a reason I didn't post it then (which I cant remember), So have mercy if the me from 3 years back is wiser than the me now.
Blog Post Begins:
"Malaysia, beautiful Malaysia"
I still remember the opening lines of my primary school's national choral speaking performance. Though that was from 12 years ago I honestly believe that those words still hold true.
The thing that got me writing this entry was because of the recent implementation of the singing of The Negaraku in cinemas before movies for the week leading up to Malaya's Independence day. I am honestly surprised at all the comments and criticism it is getting and i can't understand it at all. I recently came across this article in malaysiakini:
http://www.malaysiakini.com/letters/239366
And i must say it disturbed me.
The author pointed out how it was indeed a noble intention but was somewhat trying to force a response from its citizens to be proud of its country. He went on to point at all the sore points for Malaysian citizens and implied that its quite impossible to be proud of the country at this point in time because of the system.
But I'd beg to differ. Maybe its just how i was brought up or maybe I'm just a bit weird. But why not sing the anthem with pride? The core of singing The Negaraku is not pride, but rather love for the country. It has never depended on the state of my homeland because my homeland is and forever is my one and only home which i love. The emotion of pride does not stem from what my country has achieved. If it did, only few countries have a right to be proud. It gives more reason to be proud but pride comes from deeper things than that. Its common human experience. When you put your heart and soul into something, it doesn't quite matter what the outcome is as long as you've done what you could, you'd feel the pride of accomplishing something that is yours. It is about ownership.
Maybe we've not sung the National Anthem for so long waiting for 'pride' to kick in that we've forgotten the lyrics.
"Tanah tumpahnya darahku"
So come this 31st August or 16 September (It really doesn't matter, if you need a day to feel patriotic i doubt its true patriotism, both days are equally important), let's change our mindset. Why not focus on the beautiful and stop the negative rants on the net. Why not try to mend a relationship with someone of a different race or religion rather than sharing stories of silly politicians? Why not consider going into politics instead of sitting around waiting for 'right' candidates to vote for? Why not just sing the Negaraku because its your National Anthem and not criticize about why it won't work? Not liking some parts of your country doesn't change the fact that its yours.
I love Malaysia warts and all. That's why I'm going to stick around and do what I can. If you'd ask me to sing the National Anthem, I wouldn't care who asked me to or for what reason. Why not? It is my song. Now ask the question, is it yours?
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Sunday, August 5, 2012
The Man who moved the world
As facebook and tweeter feeds flood with messages of condolence and encouragement for one man, i am moved to write.
Lee Chong Wei.
I can only imagine what the Olympics gold meant for you. I can only imagine the unsaid burden of hopes of 28 million people. I can only imagine how heart wrenching it must be to be so close but yet so far. twice.
But even as the final shuttle struck the ground amidst euphoric screams, the silent cries of a man who gave his all was heard. It was deafening.
In the ensuing silence, the heart of a nation wept for the man who truly deserved the Olympic gold - The man who would go on to say
"I'm sorry."
In a way, i would ask what is there to be sorry about? He did everything humanly possible to do what he set out to do. Through pain, through injuries, through setbacks and even through criticism from a nation he single-handedly shouldered hopes for. After all this, he says sorry?
Truly there is nothing to be sorry about. But somehow there was something about that apology which reflected the man who won the hearts of not only the nation but even the world. Though not crowned the champion, this a man i would call a hero.
Acts Church puts it this way,
"Tonight something stirred the hearts of Malaysians. Champions are made in a second, Heroes lasts a lifetime."
I totally agree.
I think something magical happened last night. The whole world was moved. Not just Malaysia but the neutrals and even the Chinese. I came across an fb status asking why God didn't bless the one who needed the blessing. A very valid question indeed. But if you'd open your eyes a bit bigger and see the aftermath of what happened, you'd realize He actually did. Lin Dan could never accomplish what Chong Wei did even with 3 more Olympics Golds under his belt. I don't know if this is applicable, but i remember Matthew 5:5 which says " Blessed are the humble for they will inherit the earth."
On a personal account, I'm reminded of the days when i used to watch then top malaysian Ong Ewe Hock play. Despite the fact that winning titles was not a norm, i think what inspired me most was the way he played and how he would go for every shuttle. Even if it meant ending up sprawling on the ground without a point. Nope definitely didn't win him titles. But I always remember picking up my racket not long after that.
Chong Wei has done the nation proud. Even if does not end with a gold medal or history being made. I'm pretty sure it has sparked many little boys and girls to pick up their racket. I for one am going to pick up mine.
Lee Chong Wei.
I can only imagine what the Olympics gold meant for you. I can only imagine the unsaid burden of hopes of 28 million people. I can only imagine how heart wrenching it must be to be so close but yet so far. twice.
But even as the final shuttle struck the ground amidst euphoric screams, the silent cries of a man who gave his all was heard. It was deafening.
In the ensuing silence, the heart of a nation wept for the man who truly deserved the Olympic gold - The man who would go on to say
"I'm sorry."
In a way, i would ask what is there to be sorry about? He did everything humanly possible to do what he set out to do. Through pain, through injuries, through setbacks and even through criticism from a nation he single-handedly shouldered hopes for. After all this, he says sorry?
Truly there is nothing to be sorry about. But somehow there was something about that apology which reflected the man who won the hearts of not only the nation but even the world. Though not crowned the champion, this a man i would call a hero.
Acts Church puts it this way,
"Tonight something stirred the hearts of Malaysians. Champions are made in a second, Heroes lasts a lifetime."
I totally agree.
I think something magical happened last night. The whole world was moved. Not just Malaysia but the neutrals and even the Chinese. I came across an fb status asking why God didn't bless the one who needed the blessing. A very valid question indeed. But if you'd open your eyes a bit bigger and see the aftermath of what happened, you'd realize He actually did. Lin Dan could never accomplish what Chong Wei did even with 3 more Olympics Golds under his belt. I don't know if this is applicable, but i remember Matthew 5:5 which says " Blessed are the humble for they will inherit the earth."
On a personal account, I'm reminded of the days when i used to watch then top malaysian Ong Ewe Hock play. Despite the fact that winning titles was not a norm, i think what inspired me most was the way he played and how he would go for every shuttle. Even if it meant ending up sprawling on the ground without a point. Nope definitely didn't win him titles. But I always remember picking up my racket not long after that.
Chong Wei has done the nation proud. Even if does not end with a gold medal or history being made. I'm pretty sure it has sparked many little boys and girls to pick up their racket. I for one am going to pick up mine.
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Self Motivation?
Hello peeps...
My blog is dead... again...
tried to redesign it to get some inspiration to start blogging again since its between semesters...
Oh well.. i got this post out...
But its kinda late... hopefully i'll blog again soon... I must always remind myself on the reason why i blog.
=)
My blog is dead... again...
tried to redesign it to get some inspiration to start blogging again since its between semesters...
Oh well.. i got this post out...
But its kinda late... hopefully i'll blog again soon... I must always remind myself on the reason why i blog.
=)
Sunday, April 29, 2012
My thoughts on being Clean
Its been a long time.
Again i find myself in the situation to write about something i feel strongly about. Let's take a guess shall we? Of course, BERSIH 3.0.
Everyone has their own convictions. While thousands of Malaysians flocked to various areas to 'duduk bantah' i find myself unable to do so. Let me tell you why. It's not that I'm not for clean and fair elections because everyone is. But somehow i feel BERSIH has very subtly overstepped the line from being just about clean and fair elections to becoming increasingly anti-government. I just simply cannot make myself join a demonstration feeling the cause has been compromised and very much merged with an anti-government movement simply because I do not stand for the latter.
People may say I'm reading too much into things. But somehow i feel very much convicted of this and am always reminded of Romans 13:1 in spite of all the blatant corruption. This does not mean however that we should tolerate any evil dished out but speak out against such injustice. The thing we have to be careful with is how we do it that in our conduct we are blameless. I feel that BERSIH has not really exercised this caution in their statements and actions. But again, that's just my opinion of things.
Things that have been boiling my nerves recently:
1. Mainstream media and alternative media being unbelievably biased. Mainstream media i totally expected. Sorely disappointed with Malaysiakini for posting 'news' based on people's opinions which has been made to sound like facts.
http://malaysiakini.com/news/196371 title is just so so wrong.
http://malaysiakini.com/news/196435 and http://malaysiakini.com/news/196415 fact-finding mission team? invited by Anwar? biased not?
2. Treatment and hate for Police. They are human beings with emotions and feelings. They deserve compassion and to be empathised with. Generalizing all police as brutal is wrong, discriminative and backward. Look at things through their eyes for once.
3. 'BERSIH supporters' who say they are for clean and fair elections but are really just after the adrenaline rush from the experience. I came across this fb status describing how BERSIH 3.0 was great and that he/she wants to invite everyone to BERSIH 4.0. But really, if you have this cause in your heart, you would hope that changes will happen and there would be NO need for a BERSIH 4.0. Where does your focus lie?
Hmmm.. I really don't know how to respond anymore but i can't shake off what i feel about this. Seems that there is a lot of pressure for people to support this.
"What??! You don't support BERSIH?? you don't want clean elections??!!"
Anyhow, let's just pray for Malaysia. God loves Malaysia and He is still in control. Pray that God will also keep the intentions of BERSIH pure and at the same time continuously check our own stand and intentions.
Until next time....
Again i find myself in the situation to write about something i feel strongly about. Let's take a guess shall we? Of course, BERSIH 3.0.
Everyone has their own convictions. While thousands of Malaysians flocked to various areas to 'duduk bantah' i find myself unable to do so. Let me tell you why. It's not that I'm not for clean and fair elections because everyone is. But somehow i feel BERSIH has very subtly overstepped the line from being just about clean and fair elections to becoming increasingly anti-government. I just simply cannot make myself join a demonstration feeling the cause has been compromised and very much merged with an anti-government movement simply because I do not stand for the latter.
People may say I'm reading too much into things. But somehow i feel very much convicted of this and am always reminded of Romans 13:1 in spite of all the blatant corruption. This does not mean however that we should tolerate any evil dished out but speak out against such injustice. The thing we have to be careful with is how we do it that in our conduct we are blameless. I feel that BERSIH has not really exercised this caution in their statements and actions. But again, that's just my opinion of things.
Things that have been boiling my nerves recently:
1. Mainstream media and alternative media being unbelievably biased. Mainstream media i totally expected. Sorely disappointed with Malaysiakini for posting 'news' based on people's opinions which has been made to sound like facts.
http://malaysiakini.com/news/196371 title is just so so wrong.
http://malaysiakini.com/news/196435 and http://malaysiakini.com/news/196415 fact-finding mission team? invited by Anwar? biased not?
2. Treatment and hate for Police. They are human beings with emotions and feelings. They deserve compassion and to be empathised with. Generalizing all police as brutal is wrong, discriminative and backward. Look at things through their eyes for once.
3. 'BERSIH supporters' who say they are for clean and fair elections but are really just after the adrenaline rush from the experience. I came across this fb status describing how BERSIH 3.0 was great and that he/she wants to invite everyone to BERSIH 4.0. But really, if you have this cause in your heart, you would hope that changes will happen and there would be NO need for a BERSIH 4.0. Where does your focus lie?
Hmmm.. I really don't know how to respond anymore but i can't shake off what i feel about this. Seems that there is a lot of pressure for people to support this.
"What??! You don't support BERSIH?? you don't want clean elections??!!"
Anyhow, let's just pray for Malaysia. God loves Malaysia and He is still in control. Pray that God will also keep the intentions of BERSIH pure and at the same time continuously check our own stand and intentions.
Until next time....
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
What now?
If i had the power to change the world... oh imagine the wrongs i would make right... busy
If i could 'fix' the wrongs in people and have them see what i see... i'd probably change everyone..
But it ain't my right... and gosh would it be a boring world to live in if everyone thinks like me...
I think I've learned to accept that.. but sometimes it feels helpless... staring from afar.. what then can i do? a question i need to find an answer to...
If i could 'fix' the wrongs in people and have them see what i see... i'd probably change everyone..
But it ain't my right... and gosh would it be a boring world to live in if everyone thinks like me...
I think I've learned to accept that.. but sometimes it feels helpless... staring from afar.. what then can i do? a question i need to find an answer to...
Monday, July 11, 2011
BERSIH 2.5
Ladies and gentlemen.. this post is not to express my views on the recent rally in KL.. I have already over-indulged myself on fb and i am going to stop...
I think i was perfectly fine with everyone having their own opinions about the thing... then fb gets flooded with very shallow comments by people who have no idea what they are talking about... that infuriates me a lot... what is worse is when you know who these people are and all you think is.. huh?? this guy??
people who had ZERO interest in your own campus elections are suddenly super interested in general elections... i'm not even going to mention their knowledge level about our current system... let alone how they can be experts and claim that these are the measures needed for clean elections... I really have no comment for those who don't even know some of the claims made by bersih but yet have bersih pic badges in their profile...
People expect the best from the government... i expect bearable mistakes.. but yet the government fails on both accounts... But let me pose a question ... what do we expect from ourselves?? should we not expect any less?? if we demand the government to clean up should we not have cleaned up ourselves first? what major hypocrites we would be...
One of the most common things you see on fb statuses is pointing out how the government has wasted billions of taxpayers money on ridiculous stuff and expanding their own pockets... how true... but i've also seen jpa scholars and PTPTN loan takers waste these very same resources on 300 dollar watches, iphones and lcd televisions.. I'm not kidding... i wish i were about the television... well, we're not very different are we...
One may say.. nope.. i don't do that... or my parents pay my expenses... but let me take it one step further... for those studying in public universities... do you not know that your fees have been subsidized substantially by taxpayer's money? you could almost call it a scholarship... let me give you figures.. i'm paying roughly RM5000 for my 4 years here in UM for a RM60000 course my international student friends have to pay.... Now ask yourself this... ever skipped a class? ever slept in a class? we all can be honest with ourselves.. especially those uni courses like Hubungan Etnik and TITAS... now again imagine what you were doing instead of being in that class... sleeping in your room? shopping in mid-valley?? now don't tell me its not the same as what the government is doing because that is double-standard...
What i'm trying to get at is that we should all take a deep look at ourselves and think.. are we hypocrites? let's face it.. we don't expect the government to change.. if it were to change, we expect new people to rise up... but things aren't going to change for the better if the new people we so hope for comes from a pool of people with this attitude...
Whatever the implications of this rally.. let's clean ourselves up first alright? bersih 2.5 in operation...
I think i was perfectly fine with everyone having their own opinions about the thing... then fb gets flooded with very shallow comments by people who have no idea what they are talking about... that infuriates me a lot... what is worse is when you know who these people are and all you think is.. huh?? this guy??
people who had ZERO interest in your own campus elections are suddenly super interested in general elections... i'm not even going to mention their knowledge level about our current system... let alone how they can be experts and claim that these are the measures needed for clean elections... I really have no comment for those who don't even know some of the claims made by bersih but yet have bersih pic badges in their profile...
People expect the best from the government... i expect bearable mistakes.. but yet the government fails on both accounts... But let me pose a question ... what do we expect from ourselves?? should we not expect any less?? if we demand the government to clean up should we not have cleaned up ourselves first? what major hypocrites we would be...
One of the most common things you see on fb statuses is pointing out how the government has wasted billions of taxpayers money on ridiculous stuff and expanding their own pockets... how true... but i've also seen jpa scholars and PTPTN loan takers waste these very same resources on 300 dollar watches, iphones and lcd televisions.. I'm not kidding... i wish i were about the television... well, we're not very different are we...
One may say.. nope.. i don't do that... or my parents pay my expenses... but let me take it one step further... for those studying in public universities... do you not know that your fees have been subsidized substantially by taxpayer's money? you could almost call it a scholarship... let me give you figures.. i'm paying roughly RM5000 for my 4 years here in UM for a RM60000 course my international student friends have to pay.... Now ask yourself this... ever skipped a class? ever slept in a class? we all can be honest with ourselves.. especially those uni courses like Hubungan Etnik and TITAS... now again imagine what you were doing instead of being in that class... sleeping in your room? shopping in mid-valley?? now don't tell me its not the same as what the government is doing because that is double-standard...
What i'm trying to get at is that we should all take a deep look at ourselves and think.. are we hypocrites? let's face it.. we don't expect the government to change.. if it were to change, we expect new people to rise up... but things aren't going to change for the better if the new people we so hope for comes from a pool of people with this attitude...
Whatever the implications of this rally.. let's clean ourselves up first alright? bersih 2.5 in operation...
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
purging the emo in me...
Ladies and gentlemen... I officially announce to you... that I am a firm believer in Murphy's law...
Anything that can go wrong WILL and MOST SURELY go wrong....
In fact some things which you never thought could go wrong will also go wrong... It is after all a flawed world we live in. The motivation behind this blog post is just to get all this pent up frustration and disappointment out of my system... my facebook has been clogged up with emo-fied messages and i don't think its good...
I just don't understand it... I've slogged for 2 semesters.. so tired at times i just wanted to break down.. at times the only things keeping me going were the god-sent friends who supported me.. and just looking forward to a long deserved break from the craziness in UM...
And now even that is going to be taken from me?? What?? 4 months holiday now reduced to approximately a month spread out intermittently?? Little by little my holidays were sliced away.. 2 weeks, 1 week, another week.. but now 1 month!!
At first i was just angry... telling myself i'm not going through with it... but then i realise.. i can't run away at all... i'm trapped... there is no choice.. well congratulations.. you have broken my willpower... you have managed to beat me down to submission despite my defiance... you happy now??
People advise me to look at it positively.. be open minded about it.. and its true.. i should.. and i usually am... but i'm just so tired of it... i've been open minded for the past 2 semesters... telling myself its a learning experience... its good training... it will help me later on in life... just a while longer....
But its been that way for ages... but you know what? there is no little while longer is there? there is no guarantee that it will end here.. in fact it was supposed to end ages ago..
So what now? I really don't know..
I guess God has a plan... and that whatever happens.. no matter how it knocks my spirit down... when i look back i will see a different picture.... Now i see it may take many years for that to happen... For now i just don't want to be defeated...
Anything that can go wrong WILL and MOST SURELY go wrong....
In fact some things which you never thought could go wrong will also go wrong... It is after all a flawed world we live in. The motivation behind this blog post is just to get all this pent up frustration and disappointment out of my system... my facebook has been clogged up with emo-fied messages and i don't think its good...
I just don't understand it... I've slogged for 2 semesters.. so tired at times i just wanted to break down.. at times the only things keeping me going were the god-sent friends who supported me.. and just looking forward to a long deserved break from the craziness in UM...
And now even that is going to be taken from me?? What?? 4 months holiday now reduced to approximately a month spread out intermittently?? Little by little my holidays were sliced away.. 2 weeks, 1 week, another week.. but now 1 month!!
At first i was just angry... telling myself i'm not going through with it... but then i realise.. i can't run away at all... i'm trapped... there is no choice.. well congratulations.. you have broken my willpower... you have managed to beat me down to submission despite my defiance... you happy now??
People advise me to look at it positively.. be open minded about it.. and its true.. i should.. and i usually am... but i'm just so tired of it... i've been open minded for the past 2 semesters... telling myself its a learning experience... its good training... it will help me later on in life... just a while longer....
But its been that way for ages... but you know what? there is no little while longer is there? there is no guarantee that it will end here.. in fact it was supposed to end ages ago..
So what now? I really don't know..
I guess God has a plan... and that whatever happens.. no matter how it knocks my spirit down... when i look back i will see a different picture.... Now i see it may take many years for that to happen... For now i just don't want to be defeated...
Friday, June 17, 2011
I am a Jonah
Hmmm.. was reading me bible the other day and i thought it would be fun to read the famous sunday school story of Jonah again....
The story seemed funnier than i last remembered it. haha..
Just for the sake of it.. This is how the story goes...
A long long time ago... cheh.. so dramatic..
there was this guy la.. his name was Jonah..
see he was this prophet who lived sometime in the old testament.. ( a prophet is someone who is God's messenger) Now Jonah was living his own mundane life in the city when one day God tells him to get up and go to the city of Nineveh (henceforth known as 9veh XD) to deliver a message of doom!
Wait! Wha??! Message of Doom?? In the bible? yup that's right.. message of doom. See 9veh was this great big city.. and like most great big cities.. they are greatly and BIGLY (is that a word? ) corrupted... in other words.. schmeevil.... yes.. evil....
What God wanted Jonah to do.. was for him to waltz up to the hostile citizens of this great big schmeevil city.. alone... and tell them that God was going to destroy them if they did not turn from their schmeevil ways... keywords... evil,alone... definitely not winning the most desirable task award i would say..
So what does Jonah do?? He's hilarious... he runs in the direct OPPOSITE direction... no kidding... haha.. firstly.. literally the opposite direction haha... secondly, trying to run away from God .. like hello? not possible o.O
so he goes on this boat from Joppa heading towards Tarshish... when God sends a storm in their way.. Now the boat was caught in this ferocious storm and all the sailors were like frantically throwing their cargo to make the ship lighter ... what was our dear hero doing?? sleeping =.=" well.. the captain woke him up later of course...
now the crew kinda sensed the divine nature of the storm and believed it was because somebody had done something to anger God... so they threw lots and obviously Jonah was pointed out... hence ensued some sort of interrogation... and Jonah admitted everything... so the captain asked him...
"What should we do to you to make the sea calm down for us?"
"Pick me up and throw me into the sea," jawab Si Jonah
"“and it will become calm. I know that it is my fault that this great storm has come upon you."
But the Crew... so kind hearted... kinda ignored him and continued their efforts to survive.. trying to row back to shore... imagine that... if it were me ar... you asked for it isn't it?? wish granted...
*fiiiuuuuu booomm*splash* Sayonara....
But in the end.. the crew decided.. there is no other way la.. so they reluctantly threw him off into the sea.. all the while praying for forgiveness... such nice people... ironically Jonah is the prophet...
and sure enough.. the storm stops...
Now here comes the interesting part... God sends a Great Fish to swallow Jonah up...(No, it isn't a whale like the kiddy book pictures suggest...) and he stays in the belly of the beast for 3 days and 3 nights... @.@ Wha??!! yup thats right... God saves Jonah by the most outrageous of methods... not only that... he gets vomitted out on dry land too!! Hard to believe? I'll get to that later...
Anyhu.. Jonah gets the picture... he can't run.. he probably can't hide either... so he gets to doing the task assigned... Goes up to the great big 9veh and delivers the unwanted news... To my surprise!!! wahh whole city... 1200000 citizens repent and turn from their ways!! Lesson 1 ..Never underestimate the power of God... Lesson 2.. who am I to judge people so quickly... o.O
Now, you'd think Si Jonah would be happy and continue his life right?? wrong... he merajuk O.o
Why??? coz his prediction of doom didn't happen... not too good on the reputation.. and he felt this 9veh ppl deserved to be punished. Instead God was going to let them go.
Wahh... I would have sent lightning down on this Jonah to kill him... but no.. God dealt with him gently... showing him through a plant which shaded him and died.. which is another story.. and i digress coz its getting too long...
As i was saying earlier... This story is from the bible... and i believe it to be absolutely true... Many may argue... how is it possible that this si Jonah can survive in this Fish's belly? Some believe that the fish part was purely metaphorical... representing something else... Either way, what convinces me of this story is Jonah himself.... his reactions.. so silly... so rebellious... so arrogant... so selfish... so brat-ish but ever so human... SO REAL...
Isn't this how all of us react to things? that would have been exactly what i would do... no matter how funny and ridiculous i find it... I AM JONAH.. oh gosh i can't stand myself..
But the greatest part of it all... how God was so patient with Jonah... led him back through and astounding U-turn.. not letting him get harmed throughout... and then at the end of it all... Jonah was merajuk-ing??
But God still dealt with him gently... all i can say is WOW... i want that so much... do you want that too??
***interesting fact***Jonah means dove***It is possible to live in the belly of a whale***
The story seemed funnier than i last remembered it. haha..
Just for the sake of it.. This is how the story goes...
A long long time ago... cheh.. so dramatic..
there was this guy la.. his name was Jonah..
see he was this prophet who lived sometime in the old testament.. ( a prophet is someone who is God's messenger) Now Jonah was living his own mundane life in the city when one day God tells him to get up and go to the city of Nineveh (henceforth known as 9veh XD) to deliver a message of doom!
Wait! Wha??! Message of Doom?? In the bible? yup that's right.. message of doom. See 9veh was this great big city.. and like most great big cities.. they are greatly and BIGLY (is that a word? ) corrupted... in other words.. schmeevil.... yes.. evil....
What God wanted Jonah to do.. was for him to waltz up to the hostile citizens of this great big schmeevil city.. alone... and tell them that God was going to destroy them if they did not turn from their schmeevil ways... keywords... evil,alone... definitely not winning the most desirable task award i would say..
So what does Jonah do?? He's hilarious... he runs in the direct OPPOSITE direction... no kidding... haha.. firstly.. literally the opposite direction haha... secondly, trying to run away from God .. like hello? not possible o.O
so he goes on this boat from Joppa heading towards Tarshish... when God sends a storm in their way.. Now the boat was caught in this ferocious storm and all the sailors were like frantically throwing their cargo to make the ship lighter ... what was our dear hero doing?? sleeping =.=" well.. the captain woke him up later of course...
now the crew kinda sensed the divine nature of the storm and believed it was because somebody had done something to anger God... so they threw lots and obviously Jonah was pointed out... hence ensued some sort of interrogation... and Jonah admitted everything... so the captain asked him...
"What should we do to you to make the sea calm down for us?"
"Pick me up and throw me into the sea," jawab Si Jonah
"“and it will become calm. I know that it is my fault that this great storm has come upon you."
But the Crew... so kind hearted... kinda ignored him and continued their efforts to survive.. trying to row back to shore... imagine that... if it were me ar... you asked for it isn't it?? wish granted...
*fiiiuuuuu booomm*splash* Sayonara....
But in the end.. the crew decided.. there is no other way la.. so they reluctantly threw him off into the sea.. all the while praying for forgiveness... such nice people... ironically Jonah is the prophet...
and sure enough.. the storm stops...
Now here comes the interesting part... God sends a Great Fish to swallow Jonah up...(No, it isn't a whale like the kiddy book pictures suggest...) and he stays in the belly of the beast for 3 days and 3 nights... @.@ Wha??!! yup thats right... God saves Jonah by the most outrageous of methods... not only that... he gets vomitted out on dry land too!! Hard to believe? I'll get to that later...
Anyhu.. Jonah gets the picture... he can't run.. he probably can't hide either... so he gets to doing the task assigned... Goes up to the great big 9veh and delivers the unwanted news... To my surprise!!! wahh whole city... 1200000 citizens repent and turn from their ways!! Lesson 1 ..Never underestimate the power of God... Lesson 2.. who am I to judge people so quickly... o.O
Now, you'd think Si Jonah would be happy and continue his life right?? wrong... he merajuk O.o
Why??? coz his prediction of doom didn't happen... not too good on the reputation.. and he felt this 9veh ppl deserved to be punished. Instead God was going to let them go.
Wahh... I would have sent lightning down on this Jonah to kill him... but no.. God dealt with him gently... showing him through a plant which shaded him and died.. which is another story.. and i digress coz its getting too long...
As i was saying earlier... This story is from the bible... and i believe it to be absolutely true... Many may argue... how is it possible that this si Jonah can survive in this Fish's belly? Some believe that the fish part was purely metaphorical... representing something else... Either way, what convinces me of this story is Jonah himself.... his reactions.. so silly... so rebellious... so arrogant... so selfish... so brat-ish but ever so human... SO REAL...
Isn't this how all of us react to things? that would have been exactly what i would do... no matter how funny and ridiculous i find it... I AM JONAH.. oh gosh i can't stand myself..
But the greatest part of it all... how God was so patient with Jonah... led him back through and astounding U-turn.. not letting him get harmed throughout... and then at the end of it all... Jonah was merajuk-ing??
But God still dealt with him gently... all i can say is WOW... i want that so much... do you want that too??
***interesting fact***Jonah means dove***It is possible to live in the belly of a whale***
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
disinterested
I thought time at home would cure me.. well it isn't working... i realised i've just been disinterested in everything... just not really me... crazy moody on the inside... guess i should change up the pace a little...
see.. lost interest in blogging already.. oh well...
see.. lost interest in blogging already.. oh well...
Monday, May 30, 2011
Finding the way
Have you ever felt a sudden sense of panic? Out of the blue.. when you think you're at the height of a point in your life.
I guess people would never have guessed... apparently i look calm and collected all the time.. someone who is in control and looks like he knows what he's doing...
But at that moment in time.. in the middle of blurry faces i just felt lost... suddenly i just felt how insignificant my life has been... and probably will be... doing things i dislike but do well... pleasing people around but end up exhausted and drained... too tired to even enjoy good company...
I know i've grown a lot. And its great to see how far i've come. But.. essentially i'm still the same person.. still insecure, still introverted.. someone who enjoys doing background work... living a simple but satisfying life.. away from the fast lane...
Maybe i just wanted to prove something... to who I'm beginning to wonder..
At the beginning i could still see the meaning in things.. but i seem to have lost sight of that... I just want to go back to the beginning... where the meaning is clear...
things have been confusing to say the least.. i don't know how to deal with it.. just have to wait on God's timing... i really hope i don't panic and act rashly... its been staring in my face 24/7
On another note.... people have pointed out and partly i've noticed... I'm a people pleaser.. and a workaholic.... i probably will die young...
I guess people would never have guessed... apparently i look calm and collected all the time.. someone who is in control and looks like he knows what he's doing...
But at that moment in time.. in the middle of blurry faces i just felt lost... suddenly i just felt how insignificant my life has been... and probably will be... doing things i dislike but do well... pleasing people around but end up exhausted and drained... too tired to even enjoy good company...
I know i've grown a lot. And its great to see how far i've come. But.. essentially i'm still the same person.. still insecure, still introverted.. someone who enjoys doing background work... living a simple but satisfying life.. away from the fast lane...
Maybe i just wanted to prove something... to who I'm beginning to wonder..
At the beginning i could still see the meaning in things.. but i seem to have lost sight of that... I just want to go back to the beginning... where the meaning is clear...
things have been confusing to say the least.. i don't know how to deal with it.. just have to wait on God's timing... i really hope i don't panic and act rashly... its been staring in my face 24/7
On another note.... people have pointed out and partly i've noticed... I'm a people pleaser.. and a workaholic.... i probably will die young...
Monday, April 18, 2011
skema from young..
I feel like blogging about something happy today. Seems like my blog has been an emo dump of late. Anyway, i don't quite know what to blog about that is happy...
I noticed how i like to look back on past experiences.. thinking of all the things i used to do and comparing them somewhat to what i do now. What i can say about my childhood was it was pleasant. Rather uneventful actually.. something which was pointed out to me recently. But still, i would classify it as carefree and sheltered. What i mostly remember was cycling around, watching tv and playing with lego.
All the while, I have great parents who disciplined me early.. as a result i was kind of the guy who follows rules to the dot.So, i mostly stayed out of mischief and was probably a teacher's pet @.@
Didn't quite understand what i was doing in school until about standard 3 which was when i started to take my studies a little more seriously.
I think that early upbringing was vital in shaping who i am now. Flash forward.. I'm still someone who follows rules quite religiously. For example, I still wear my matric card around campus.. I'm still me. There are changes... there are improvements as well. But fundamentally I'm still that little boy who wandered the hallways of SKTRJ with his hair uncombed. In a way I'm glad I'm still nerdy.. simple and optimistic. HAHA..
I don't really know the point of this post.. but I'm excited to see how my now will affect what I am to be... I have hopes and dreams and a general idea of who i want to be. I foresee excitement soon as my first year in UM draws to a close and as the events of my life unfold i will observe the shaping of myself. No matter what though I'll still bet my money on being nerdy haha.
Until i have better things to blog about...
I noticed how i like to look back on past experiences.. thinking of all the things i used to do and comparing them somewhat to what i do now. What i can say about my childhood was it was pleasant. Rather uneventful actually.. something which was pointed out to me recently. But still, i would classify it as carefree and sheltered. What i mostly remember was cycling around, watching tv and playing with lego.
All the while, I have great parents who disciplined me early.. as a result i was kind of the guy who follows rules to the dot.So, i mostly stayed out of mischief and was probably a teacher's pet @.@
Didn't quite understand what i was doing in school until about standard 3 which was when i started to take my studies a little more seriously.
I think that early upbringing was vital in shaping who i am now. Flash forward.. I'm still someone who follows rules quite religiously. For example, I still wear my matric card around campus.. I'm still me. There are changes... there are improvements as well. But fundamentally I'm still that little boy who wandered the hallways of SKTRJ with his hair uncombed. In a way I'm glad I'm still nerdy.. simple and optimistic. HAHA..
I don't really know the point of this post.. but I'm excited to see how my now will affect what I am to be... I have hopes and dreams and a general idea of who i want to be. I foresee excitement soon as my first year in UM draws to a close and as the events of my life unfold i will observe the shaping of myself. No matter what though I'll still bet my money on being nerdy haha.
Until i have better things to blog about...
Saturday, March 26, 2011
A little confession, A big thanks..
Somehow i always have the urge to change people. I feel like walking right up to them and tell them... "this is how you should live your life."
All this while i had the notion that it was always for their own good. I was helping them. I have the best intentions. But the more i think about it... its a very selfish thing to do. Advising then demanding and almost expecting that they change. Such arrogance i must say.
But that's just not how life works isn't it?
I look in the mirror and I am ashamed. Maybe some part of me needs to feel like i'm helping out in a noble way. Selfishness. Just to feed my own emotional insecurities.
I really don't think it started off this way. But i guess somewhere along the lines.. the true intentions got blurred out. It's sad that it got this way. But I'm glad i came to my senses. After all.. a clear conscience is the best mattress.
Ahah.. now that that is out of my system, just wanted to acknowledge and thank God for helping me through a period of unbelievable madness. Minggu KEBATIM, MPD 2 phases, Easter, and APK...
For the first time in my life i could foresee days which i knew very well would break my spirit. Days shrouded with blackness so much so that i didn't want to face it. Almost a month long without break or a chance to just savor the completion of something. I didn't like it at all. I knew i would be stressed out.. i knew i would have insufficient sleep... i knew my studies will suffer... But mostly because i knew i would become somebody i didn't like... snappy, naggy, grumpy tim..
I even pre-warned close friends. But God was good.
He sent me angels to keep me going all throughout the time. Like sweet reminders and boosts of happiness and encouragement. I owe it to my friends and family XD
Seriously.. it was all i had to keep me from breaking down. And I'm really not kidding. There were times where i wanted to run out and break something. I was even entertaining thoughts of being knocked down so that i wouldn't have to face the days.
When i came home last week... i was close to tears... no exaggeration. God is just so so good.. Reminds me.. you don't tell God how big your problem is... you tell your problem how big God is...
God is awesome!
All this while i had the notion that it was always for their own good. I was helping them. I have the best intentions. But the more i think about it... its a very selfish thing to do. Advising then demanding and almost expecting that they change. Such arrogance i must say.
But that's just not how life works isn't it?
I look in the mirror and I am ashamed. Maybe some part of me needs to feel like i'm helping out in a noble way. Selfishness. Just to feed my own emotional insecurities.
I really don't think it started off this way. But i guess somewhere along the lines.. the true intentions got blurred out. It's sad that it got this way. But I'm glad i came to my senses. After all.. a clear conscience is the best mattress.
For the first time in my life i could foresee days which i knew very well would break my spirit. Days shrouded with blackness so much so that i didn't want to face it. Almost a month long without break or a chance to just savor the completion of something. I didn't like it at all. I knew i would be stressed out.. i knew i would have insufficient sleep... i knew my studies will suffer... But mostly because i knew i would become somebody i didn't like... snappy, naggy, grumpy tim..
I even pre-warned close friends. But God was good.
He sent me angels to keep me going all throughout the time. Like sweet reminders and boosts of happiness and encouragement. I owe it to my friends and family XD
Seriously.. it was all i had to keep me from breaking down. And I'm really not kidding. There were times where i wanted to run out and break something. I was even entertaining thoughts of being knocked down so that i wouldn't have to face the days.
When i came home last week... i was close to tears... no exaggeration. God is just so so good.. Reminds me.. you don't tell God how big your problem is... you tell your problem how big God is...
God is awesome!
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
What's the verdict??
I always knew I would return someday. I've always loved writing and facebook doesn't really cut it as an outlet for me.
The last time I posted, I was on the verge on entering the doorways of University Malaya and here I am now in the midst of my second semester. Oh how time flies.
Its been fun for the most part. The experiences have been draining but undoubtedly satisfying. Through it all I've grown to love my course and my course mates, my college and my collegians and University Malaya has been kind so far.
Like what many have said before, campus life will be the time you get a glimpse of the so-called real world as you trudge carefully out of the cocoon you've been so comfortable in. So what's the verdict? (Also the title of the upcoming PKV Easter play) What is this glimpse that i have seen?
The one thing that strikes me the most is how much hurt, pain and sadness there is in the world. The disappointments I've seen are real and are scarring. Scars that are obvious by how people live so defensively, cautiously, paranoid even. How they tenaciously guard themselves from feeling the same hurts. Some losing hope in hope itself.
Maybe I've been blessed. Whatever hardships I've faced so far are not as remotely close to what people have faced. Probably why my life's optimism is looked upon with skeptical eyes. At times, I'm just left speechless. It's just sad when people just stop hoping for something better.
A stark contrast to how my life has been before is how friendship is treated like a one chance thing. You are my friend up until the point you wrong me. So fragile these friendships are. The picture I had previously was by no means all rosy and pleasant. But friendship was something you fought for, something you would scale the highest mountains for just a chance at patching up. It seems now that people would much rather throw it all away to save the heartache.
Sometimes, the more i think of it, the more depressing it is. But it just goes to show how much the world needs God. How much they are missing the message of forgiveness and love. I really hope that i can somehow show this to them. Things never seem right until you put God in the picture. Only then, you see the perfect picture.
The last time I posted, I was on the verge on entering the doorways of University Malaya and here I am now in the midst of my second semester. Oh how time flies.
Its been fun for the most part. The experiences have been draining but undoubtedly satisfying. Through it all I've grown to love my course and my course mates, my college and my collegians and University Malaya has been kind so far.
Like what many have said before, campus life will be the time you get a glimpse of the so-called real world as you trudge carefully out of the cocoon you've been so comfortable in. So what's the verdict? (Also the title of the upcoming PKV Easter play) What is this glimpse that i have seen?
The one thing that strikes me the most is how much hurt, pain and sadness there is in the world. The disappointments I've seen are real and are scarring. Scars that are obvious by how people live so defensively, cautiously, paranoid even. How they tenaciously guard themselves from feeling the same hurts. Some losing hope in hope itself.
Maybe I've been blessed. Whatever hardships I've faced so far are not as remotely close to what people have faced. Probably why my life's optimism is looked upon with skeptical eyes. At times, I'm just left speechless. It's just sad when people just stop hoping for something better.
A stark contrast to how my life has been before is how friendship is treated like a one chance thing. You are my friend up until the point you wrong me. So fragile these friendships are. The picture I had previously was by no means all rosy and pleasant. But friendship was something you fought for, something you would scale the highest mountains for just a chance at patching up. It seems now that people would much rather throw it all away to save the heartache.
Sometimes, the more i think of it, the more depressing it is. But it just goes to show how much the world needs God. How much they are missing the message of forgiveness and love. I really hope that i can somehow show this to them. Things never seem right until you put God in the picture. Only then, you see the perfect picture.
Friday, July 2, 2010
Beginnings and Endings
The following few days will be a momentous day for many of us. Whether we like it or not, it marks the beginning of a new chapter in life - the passageway to adulthood. On the 4th of July, I will be leaving for UM, my dad's alma mater to pursue a degree in Biomedical Engineering. I'm excited yet I'm nervous all at the same time. Deep inside there is a sense of fear and reluctance as well. I guess its because there are things in my life which will only continue to exists in my life as memories.
Things I will miss...
them. My Sis. Though she already 'left the nest', I guess I'll continue to miss her more. Kit. Having shared so much for so long, life is definitely going to be missing something now.
In a time like this.. I remember something..
a time for every activity under heaven.
2 A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.
3 A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
4 A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
5 A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
6 A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
7 A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
8 A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace.
To all my friends, no matter where you are... I really hope you guys will... (at the risk of sounding corny) reach for the stars... Never forget the things that matter... There will always be a place for you in my heart.
Things I will miss...
Family
Mom and dad. I really thank God for putting such great people in my life. I just wouldn't be me withoutthem. My Sis. Though she already 'left the nest', I guess I'll continue to miss her more. Kit. Having shared so much for so long, life is definitely going to be missing something now.
Friends
So many in this category. LOL I guess it isn't fair to mention people just because there are so many of you who have truly been great friends in every sense. I will definitely miss the outings.. the company. My only regret is not having spent more time knowing that we won't see much of each other in the near future. Really hope we do get to meet up from time to time no matter how far apart we are.School
In a weird sense, i guess i'll miss it. Teachers and all.Home
This is just going to feel like a really long camp.In a time like this.. I remember something..
Ecclesiastes 3
A Time for Everything
1 For everything there is a season,a time for every activity under heaven.
2 A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.
3 A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
4 A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
5 A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
6 A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
7 A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
8 A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace.
I guess its time to grow up =)
I'll keep these things close to my heart no matter what.To all my friends, no matter where you are... I really hope you guys will... (at the risk of sounding corny) reach for the stars... Never forget the things that matter... There will always be a place for you in my heart.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Memories to cherish
Iskandarians finally had our outing!!! yay =)
It was kinda rushed... it was last minute... but it went very very well =)
PICNIC + BOWLING + LUNCH + BADMINTON
I really have to thank mc and xy for taking the initiative to plan this thing. I really really appreciate their effort!! Believe me it isn't easy. Basic prerequisites include patience, patience and more patience. I don't have much of that i suppose.
Anyway, i tumpang-ed xy that day and we were early hahha.. very early.. mc was late lol. We found a nice spot and set up. One by one they came.. mc, mandy, kc and then the 'injured' devar. Then was makan time =) sandwiches salad jelly ... not bad huh? All of the sudden i found myself surrounded by childish kids playing with a water gun -_-"
At abt 11 when it started to get hot we went to jusco!! Met up with wei liang, Siva and Kumar for some bowling.. Very happy i could manage a 3 digit score =) but still only placed 3rd haha... they were lucky today.. siva and mc... can't believe it haha...
After lunch it was time for badminton... another platform for Siva to show off... pity Devar the most... even wei liang got a smash on the forehead... haha..
Really had a good time last thursday. Just good times in good company. I thank God that we had this chance to have fun because who knows when we will be meeting each other again.I really want to take this opportunity to wish all my friends from Iskandar all the best =) I really treasure the moments. In one way or another you guys have influenced me to be who i am today. And so i am forever indebted to you guys =) Love all of you !!
BTW, happy birthday to mc tomorrow =)
20 already, pls start acting it hahhaha have a good one God bless
It was kinda rushed... it was last minute... but it went very very well =)
PICNIC + BOWLING + LUNCH + BADMINTON
I really have to thank mc and xy for taking the initiative to plan this thing. I really really appreciate their effort!! Believe me it isn't easy. Basic prerequisites include patience, patience and more patience. I don't have much of that i suppose.
Anyway, i tumpang-ed xy that day and we were early hahha.. very early.. mc was late lol. We found a nice spot and set up. One by one they came.. mc, mandy, kc and then the 'injured' devar. Then was makan time =) sandwiches salad jelly ... not bad huh? All of the sudden i found myself surrounded by childish kids playing with a water gun -_-"
At abt 11 when it started to get hot we went to jusco!! Met up with wei liang, Siva and Kumar for some bowling.. Very happy i could manage a 3 digit score =) but still only placed 3rd haha... they were lucky today.. siva and mc... can't believe it haha...
After lunch it was time for badminton... another platform for Siva to show off... pity Devar the most... even wei liang got a smash on the forehead... haha..
Really had a good time last thursday. Just good times in good company. I thank God that we had this chance to have fun because who knows when we will be meeting each other again.I really want to take this opportunity to wish all my friends from Iskandar all the best =) I really treasure the moments. In one way or another you guys have influenced me to be who i am today. And so i am forever indebted to you guys =) Love all of you !!
20 already, pls start acting it hahhaha have a good one God bless
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Give it time
AND THE WAIT IS OVER!!!
Oh well, i didn't get it. The world isn't going to end. It would have been nice but i guess God has better plans.
Just wanted to update my blog.. since my last post was about the wait... Anyway, i always believe that God allows things to happen for a reason. Reminds me of a song from Joseph the Dreamer..
" You know better than i,
You know the way,
I've let go my need to know why,
I'll take what answers you supply,
For you know better than I."
Note to self: Look back and see God's great plans in action.
Oh well, i didn't get it. The world isn't going to end. It would have been nice but i guess God has better plans.
Just wanted to update my blog.. since my last post was about the wait... Anyway, i always believe that God allows things to happen for a reason. Reminds me of a song from Joseph the Dreamer..
" You know better than i,
You know the way,
I've let go my need to know why,
I'll take what answers you supply,
For you know better than I."
Note to self: Look back and see God's great plans in action.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
The Wait
I've been waiting for close to 2 months now. But still there is no reply. The wait is agonizing.
Honestly, this whole Bank Negara experience has been very helpful and so far I feel it has been not so much about the scholarship but about personal development. I learned a lot during the interview process as well as meeting quite a few cool friends which i would never have had a chance to meet. Undeniably getting the scholarship would be awesome but I told myself long ago not to expect anything simply because I don't want to get disappointed. But just recently there was this rumor i heard that one of the guys from the interviews had got the call. ( means we people who did not get the call were rejected )
I felt something - a tinge of sadness and disappointment. And i started wondering whether I was who i thought and said I was. I always thought i could handle it well and be able to move on stronger without looking back at what might have been because what God has in store for me is way better.
But as it turns out I'm not there yet. Maybe I need to learn to deal with disappointment more and what better way to learn that experience it.
But I found out that it wasn't as we made it out to be.. The guy got the call because Bank negara needed to clarify some details. o.O
Anyway, the wait continues. I shall learn to be more patient. No matter what the outcome, i will do my best to accept it and hopefully this time I can handle it.
Honestly, this whole Bank Negara experience has been very helpful and so far I feel it has been not so much about the scholarship but about personal development. I learned a lot during the interview process as well as meeting quite a few cool friends which i would never have had a chance to meet. Undeniably getting the scholarship would be awesome but I told myself long ago not to expect anything simply because I don't want to get disappointed. But just recently there was this rumor i heard that one of the guys from the interviews had got the call. ( means we people who did not get the call were rejected )
I felt something - a tinge of sadness and disappointment. And i started wondering whether I was who i thought and said I was. I always thought i could handle it well and be able to move on stronger without looking back at what might have been because what God has in store for me is way better.
But as it turns out I'm not there yet. Maybe I need to learn to deal with disappointment more and what better way to learn that experience it.
But I found out that it wasn't as we made it out to be.. The guy got the call because Bank negara needed to clarify some details. o.O
Anyway, the wait continues. I shall learn to be more patient. No matter what the outcome, i will do my best to accept it and hopefully this time I can handle it.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Monday, April 12, 2010
La Vie En Rose
La Vie En Rose - Life in rosy hues
I was just listening to this song called La vie en rose and i was reminded of how moving music can be. Literally, it means life through pink-coloured glasses or life in pink. But my favourite translation would be life in rosy hues. So i thought I'd do some music appreciation.
I close my eyes and listen.
The music starts. I hear the sounds of the piano. Like water streaming - quick yet gentle and subtle. It sets my mind at ease. Like the slow flow of a river... my soul is at rest. And then, seamlessly the beautiful melody of the trumpet fills the air. Note by note with conviction but without imposing. Somehow i find myself along the sidewalk of a brick road. Just watching. Watching as the night sky is filled with a majestic crimson hue in splashes - almost like a painting. I stand there watching. Lovebirds hand in hand walking along the dusty pavement. He puts his arm around her and looks at her as though she were the only thing that mattered. In that brief moment, a fragment in time... he realizes that his world revolves around her. Her gentle eyes, windows to her soul... reveals the same things. Like kids, they laughed and giggled, whisper sweet nothings.
*They start to dance. Clumsy but elegant. With beautiful movement they swayed in unison all the while laughing and gazing into each other's eyes - like no one was watching. The song - words heartfelt sung like a love poem while no one was listening. Surely they were in love. Taking that leap of trust and faith like they've never been hurt. They were free like birds. No one to tell them how to live or who to live for. Just together like heaven on Earth.*
Smiling, they finally settled on a wooden bench exhausted but elated. They huddle close as she leans her head on his shoulders. They gaze into the crimson sky - trying to crystallize this moment in their memory forever. They watched the sky together until the sun set beyond the endless horizon.
La vie en rose.
-song ends-
Somehow i feel like i should spend some time writing a song =)
* * I rephrased Mark Twain
Lyrics | Louis Armstrong lyrics - La Vie En Rose lyrics
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Long Long Interview = Long Long Post
How should you react when you get called up for an interview???
i dunno... who said i was going to tell you anyway =)
Anyway, i received a call up on Thursday to go for Bank Negara Scholarship interviews. Apparently they had sent an e-mail to me and i was supposed to reply them. So i casually opened up my mail which is usually filled with facebook updates, and sure enough it was there in my deleted messages - dated the previous Tuesday. I shuddered to think of what would have happened if they hadn't called me.
I didn't know what to expect since the interview letter stated 7.30 am to 6.00 pm @.@ So i just did some research on Bank Negara ( an interesting read actually, finally understood some economic things i heard of before) and read an article about going through interviews i had pulled out of The Star a week before. Its really strange and amazing how God works. I saw the article, thought 'hey, this is interesting!', pulled it out and put it on the table. A week later, WOW!! A need fulfilled.
I woke up at about 5.00 am that Monday. Took a bath, had light breakfast and headed to Lanai Kijang where the interviews are held. When i reached there, i had a plan. I'd make friends, be friendly and have a good time. But the moment i reached the lobby, a wave of coldness took over me. I just sat there in the lobby with the others. Too frozen to do anything. I was so nervous and i don't know why. So i just said a silent prayer and tried to mix around. By the grace of God I was a bit more warmed up during breakfast and soon we were being briefed. We were told that out of the 2600 applicants only 37 of us were shortlisted!!! Wow, i couldn't help but feel a bit proud =)
The first stage, essay writing. 1 hour 2 essays 1 english 1 malay. Honestly, i wrote nonsense. 1 hour for 1 is not enough for me let alone 2. I struggled with the bm essay a lot not because i was rusty but because i just couldn't think of any points, well not in that time frame. So i just wrote whatever that popped up in my empty mind and pray it made sense lol. I really hope this part does not weigh much XD
Immediately after that i was sent to have my 3 to 1 interview since i was first in the orange group list. And you know what?? I loved my interview. It was nice since the 3 interviewers were really friendly and nice. It was more like a chit chat session i guess =) Come to think of it, i felt that the whole Bank Negara staff were really friendly. It wasn't that kind of put-on-fake-smile that you see everywhere but i really felt genuine warmth.
Next up for me was individual presentation where they would give us a case study to present. The case was 'Working at home through the internet' and i opposed it. I did this in MUET before but anyhow i was still rushed and i didn't really have time to compose my thoughts. As a result i think my presentation was a bit clumsy and cluttered. After that, i was bombarded with difficult and tricky questions and i was able to answer all of them but i wouldn't know how well i answered them lol. Overall i think i did ok here but it isn't a good sign when one of your points get questioned =)
After that i was pretty free. If only i knew i would have brought a book. I waited with my team mates as there was only the group presentation left. But some of my mates had not finished their interviews yet - pity them. Group presentation was the most challenging part of all. They gave us this case study of us being a SMCT (Special Mission Critical Team) of Sunrise Construction Sdn. Bhd. whereby we were supposed to propose several management initiatives to the company during the current economic crisis. Our list of to do's
Take up specific roles and explain our job (project manager etc.)
Present our ideas to the management
Suggest problems that may arise and how to solve it.
Problem was we had 20 minutes to prepare while they watched us @.@ and... after reading the really long question twice... i was still blur... I didn't dare open my mouth. But somehow we managed. After our presentation, they fired us with questions and gosh some of them just made me freeze because i just didn't know how to answer them. But i guess we did well in the sense we covered up for each other well. =) Love my team yeah!!
So that was it. The entire interview process. Just wanted to thank everyone for their well wishes, prayers and concern. Really helped!! I omitted tonnes of details because i know this is a really long post and its so dry... Anyways, until next time. Praise the Lord!!
i dunno... who said i was going to tell you anyway =)
Anyway, i received a call up on Thursday to go for Bank Negara Scholarship interviews. Apparently they had sent an e-mail to me and i was supposed to reply them. So i casually opened up my mail which is usually filled with facebook updates, and sure enough it was there in my deleted messages - dated the previous Tuesday. I shuddered to think of what would have happened if they hadn't called me.
I didn't know what to expect since the interview letter stated 7.30 am to 6.00 pm @.@ So i just did some research on Bank Negara ( an interesting read actually, finally understood some economic things i heard of before) and read an article about going through interviews i had pulled out of The Star a week before. Its really strange and amazing how God works. I saw the article, thought 'hey, this is interesting!', pulled it out and put it on the table. A week later, WOW!! A need fulfilled.
I woke up at about 5.00 am that Monday. Took a bath, had light breakfast and headed to Lanai Kijang where the interviews are held. When i reached there, i had a plan. I'd make friends, be friendly and have a good time. But the moment i reached the lobby, a wave of coldness took over me. I just sat there in the lobby with the others. Too frozen to do anything. I was so nervous and i don't know why. So i just said a silent prayer and tried to mix around. By the grace of God I was a bit more warmed up during breakfast and soon we were being briefed. We were told that out of the 2600 applicants only 37 of us were shortlisted!!! Wow, i couldn't help but feel a bit proud =)
The first stage, essay writing. 1 hour 2 essays 1 english 1 malay. Honestly, i wrote nonsense. 1 hour for 1 is not enough for me let alone 2. I struggled with the bm essay a lot not because i was rusty but because i just couldn't think of any points, well not in that time frame. So i just wrote whatever that popped up in my empty mind and pray it made sense lol. I really hope this part does not weigh much XD
Immediately after that i was sent to have my 3 to 1 interview since i was first in the orange group list. And you know what?? I loved my interview. It was nice since the 3 interviewers were really friendly and nice. It was more like a chit chat session i guess =) Come to think of it, i felt that the whole Bank Negara staff were really friendly. It wasn't that kind of put-on-fake-smile that you see everywhere but i really felt genuine warmth.
Next up for me was individual presentation where they would give us a case study to present. The case was 'Working at home through the internet' and i opposed it. I did this in MUET before but anyhow i was still rushed and i didn't really have time to compose my thoughts. As a result i think my presentation was a bit clumsy and cluttered. After that, i was bombarded with difficult and tricky questions and i was able to answer all of them but i wouldn't know how well i answered them lol. Overall i think i did ok here but it isn't a good sign when one of your points get questioned =)
After that i was pretty free. If only i knew i would have brought a book. I waited with my team mates as there was only the group presentation left. But some of my mates had not finished their interviews yet - pity them. Group presentation was the most challenging part of all. They gave us this case study of us being a SMCT (Special Mission Critical Team) of Sunrise Construction Sdn. Bhd. whereby we were supposed to propose several management initiatives to the company during the current economic crisis. Our list of to do's
Take up specific roles and explain our job (project manager etc.)
Present our ideas to the management
Suggest problems that may arise and how to solve it.
Problem was we had 20 minutes to prepare while they watched us @.@ and... after reading the really long question twice... i was still blur... I didn't dare open my mouth. But somehow we managed. After our presentation, they fired us with questions and gosh some of them just made me freeze because i just didn't know how to answer them. But i guess we did well in the sense we covered up for each other well. =) Love my team yeah!!
So that was it. The entire interview process. Just wanted to thank everyone for their well wishes, prayers and concern. Really helped!! I omitted tonnes of details because i know this is a really long post and its so dry... Anyways, until next time. Praise the Lord!!
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